Confessions of a relationship counsellor

Going through my own relationship difficulties many years ago, lead my wife and I to explore relationship counselling. At the time I was working as a general counsellor and didn’t understand the true complexities of couple’s counselling. If I did I may have recognised that the help we received in many ways was not great; in that it focused on what was not working, gave justifications for ending the relationship, didn’t manage the strong emotions present and even framed the raw emotions as a sign things were not working.

The outcome from a mere three sessions was that my wife made a decision to end the relationship and our seventeen year union was brought to an end. I still firmly believe that if we were managed by a different approach we may have had a more positive outcome and we may even still be together.

When going through intense difficulties with our partners we often forget why we got together in the first place. We forget the good times and dreams we shared that made us want to commit. That’s why choosing an experienced qualified counsellor with the skill set and training to make a positive difference is critical, if you want to make it work!

As a result of the combinations of specific trainings I have done in Narrative Mediation and Restorative Justice Facilitation I call the way I work Restorative Mediation. My approach addresses the harm done in a relationship, provides a context for understanding each other’s perspective and for taking responsibility for what we have done that undermined the integrity of the relationship. If conflict and hurt is managed well it can open space for compassion and empathy towards each other as well as forgiveness and a renewed commitment to work in with each other again.

At Auckland Counselling I provide couples with the means to address what hasn’t worked, to restore integrity to the relationship and maintain the progress with specific communication skills and techniques to keep the relationship growing and moving forward.

As part of my Masters degree in Counselling, I have had extensive professional training in couples and family counselling, mediation and restorative practices. As a result of my qualifications and experiences I work efficiently to get relationships functional again by helping couples address what is not working and deal with harm done within the relationship so that love can flourish.
The most rewarding aspect of the work I do at Auckland Counselling is seeing the positive difference made for clients. Creating positive change within the dynamics of relationships is what I’m totally committed to. I go about doing this by utilizing practical skills that enable clients to discover resources, strengths and abilities while also incorporating and acknowledging the struggles, disappointments and despair. I am dedicated to achieving positive change in the most respectful, open and professional way possible.

Choosing to work with me means you are dealing with a highly qualified and experienced counselling professional who is committed towards achieving results for you.

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